The Upside of Breaking Up

Breakups suck. They suck so fucking much. I’ve been through one that left me laying on the couch, depressed and unable to do anything for about a week. Things (slowly) got better after that week. After a lot more time, things got much better and eventually I was thankful the relationship was over.

And I actually mean it when I say thankful. If he came to me all sweet and begged for me to take him back, I wouldn’t. Even when I was thankful though, I’d sometimes wake up in the mornings sometimes struck by the fact that I was alone. I no longer had someone that was obligated to hang out with me, talk to me and be on my team.

I greived over this idea of losing my teammate for a long time before I realized that dating him was kind of like doing crappy partner work in school where the workload is never equal and you know you’d be better off going at it alone.

Its like the two of you had a great idea for a project. And it wasnt just a boring assignment, but some truly amazing project that you knew you were both so excited about.

You start working on it but then: part way through you realize that you and your partner arent on the same page. While youre putting all your energy into making this project it as good as it can be, your partner is barely invested in what you’re doing! He’s still working on the project, but nothing that he adds seems to make any sense to you. More than that, you feel like he’s neglecting the work you see as a priority. It sucks because your partner was very smart and is a good person to work with. Only he isn’t working with you.

Or maybe your partner wasn’t even invested in the project. She sweet talked you and she bargained with you and then in the end you did all of her work. She was a supervisor that didn’t listen to any of your input. Your input was good- I’ll tell you that right now.

Relationships are a two way street and if your ex-partner wasnt willing to work with you on it, then maybe its better that things are over. No matter how much potientially they have to be a good partner, if they’re never showing their good points than those good points may as well not exist.

Yeah being alone takes some adjustment, but you probably wont have to be alone forever. Being single gives you more time to work on your life’s project. You have a lot of great ideas and you probably know what you’re doing better than anyone else would.

So while it’s perfectly okay to mourn your relationship, don’t forget that it’s over for a reason. Better things are waiting ahead ❤

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